Better Days

Well if all goes as planned Brian will be getting on a plane and heading home soon. They released him from the hospital yesterday afternoon with a diagnosis of vertigo and his equilibrium was out of balance. Now Brian is one of those people who gets dizzy just watching the kids on the merry-go-round, so one would expect the sudden room spinning induced by vertigo to make him sicker than a dog - and it did. At least that is what the doctors said. He seems to be feeling better but isn't looking forward to the plane ride home.

On another note - 4 years ago today (at 4:09 AM to be exact) Skylar made her debut into the world. She is very excited that it is her birthday and she can't wait until her party on Saturday. Of course it will be a princess party because after all she is a princess - just ask her. I will be sure to post pictures of the cake and the birthday girl blowing out all of those candles.

Life is Getting Stressful

Things were going good...and then...

Isn't that how it always happens? Just when things seem to be shaping up the bottom falls out. Brian is out of town on business, and he called me this morning to tell me they were taking him to the emergency room. He was getting very dizzy and his blood pressure and heart rate were through the roof. Now this isn't really anything too new for us as we have dealt with this before but with him being out of town where there is no way for me to be by his side makes dealing with it this time a whole new ballgame.

So I just ask that you remember us in your prayers. He is supposed to fly home tomorrow, but with this turn of events who knows what will happen.

Holiday Weekends are the Worst

Don't get me wrong, I loved the time off. I even managed to make it a four day weekend, but it really messed with my game plan. I have found that when I am at home I am an afternoon snacker. It doesn't matter that I just ate lunch - I want something to eat around 3 and I don't want to stop until time for supper. So back on plan this morning...damage control.

Challenge Update

Well for this weeks challenge over at Tales from the Scales, I lost 1/2 pound. I am not complaining. That only leaves eight pounds to go. I had a non scale victory this past week as well. I went to the doctor for a physical (yes this was a result of all of the recent cancer diagnoses), and she was impressed with my recent weight loss as well as my maintenance of my previous weight loss. It is always a confidence booster for a health professional to be impressed.
***update*** I just got a call from the doctor's office and the results of all of my labwork was "very normal". I really like being normal.

I have still been reading The Beck Diet Solution. As I get farther into it, I can recognize several things I have done that have made my journey a success this time while I wasn't really conscious of them at the time. However, reading them has made me more conscious and has really reinforced those ideas. Everything from being accountable to a coach to tracking what I eat to simply knowing that it is OK to feel hungry at times.

Down with the Old Man...

up with the new. Last night Stephen got baptized. Ever since he got saved back on Good Friday he has been asking when he could be baptized. It wasn't something I wanted him to feel pushed into doing, so we talked about what it meant several times, and I told him when he felt he was ready just to let us know. Well last Sunday he asked Bro. Wayne when he was going to baptize him. I am so proud of him, and I hope he continues to grow in his love for Christ. He is even going to church camp this summer. That should be a wonderful experience for him.

Tracking What I Eat

One of the most important changes I made to lose weight was being truly aware of everything I put in my mouth. I follow the weight watchers plan which assigns a point value based on calories, fat, and fiber content of foods. When I first started, I was very meticulous at writing everything down that I ate. As I was on the plan for a while I began to rely on my memory which if you know me at all isn't very good. But it was hard for me to always have a journal with me to log my points as I went. This is not just a problem I have, as I was reading on Roni's Weight Watchen Page that others also sometimes have problems journaling and tracking. So what did I do?

While surfing the Internet reading up on everything weight watchers I found a neat little bracelet that they offer to help you track your points throughout the day. Here is a photo of the bracelet that is available through Weight Watchers.

Keeping track of your daily POINTS values has never been easier, more convenient
or less noticeable. Slip this stylish beaded bracelet on and forget the pencil
and paper! Each pearl represents 1 POINT and the silver pearl marks 5 POINTS
increments, providing an easy visual aid. Whenever you eat, move the charm the
appropriate number of pearls on the bracelet and you’re on your way!

Now of course being the crafty and thrifty (a nice way of saying cheap) person that I am, I decided to make my own bracelets. I now have six or seven in various colors and styles, and you will see me with one of them on most of the time. It has really helped me to always be aware of just how much I have eaten throughout the day.

Don't Ask Why

It is hard not to ask why when bad things happen to good people. Romans 8:28 says,

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

I know God has a plan and everything works together for his plan, but it seems here lately that so many things have been happening that are hard not to question.

Brian's cousin and close friend was diagnosed with colon cancer last week. He is only 35 years old, and he has two young boys. They did surgery yesterday and found that it had spread to his lymph nodes. The prognosis isn't good. I know that God can work miracles, but it is still hard not to wonder why this is happening. I will be praying daily for a miracle, as well as for God to give him the strength to endure, and the comfort that only God can provide.

Another friend of mine lost a cousin to cancer yesterday. He was only 40 and had only been diagnosed for seven weeks. It progressed extremely fast. He left a wife and three children. His family really needs our prayers during this time. I can't imagine how they must be feeling. They are a Christian family as well, so I pray that they receive comfort from God during this heartbreaking time.

Meanwhile, it really makes me thankful for my health as well as the health of my family. It also makes me realize how important it is to see a doctor at the first sign of anything out of the ordinary. I will be making an appointment soon just to get a checkup and I suggest that you all do the same.

The Challenge

Well it has been one week since I joined the weight loss challenge at Tales from the Scales. I am down 2 pounds this week. That only leaves 8.5 pounds to my goal. I truly never thought I would get this far when I started back in January. Even after losing the weight I had already lost I guess I really thought I couldn't lose the rest. I am so glad that I got my head on right again though, and I know with the support of my buddies and a lot of prayer I will not only reach my goal but be able to maintain it as well.

Happy Belated Mother's Day

Happy Mother's day everyone. So it's a day late big deal - every mother deserves recognition EVERYDAY!


I had a wonderful weekend. We went to the Traveler's game Friday night and even though we didn't stay all that long due to the lightening we had a good time. The kids enjoyed it a lot - especially Skylar. She got to play with Miss Kathy, so I don't know that either of them got to see any of the game.
Stephen got to run the bases between the two games and he really got a kick out of it. He was really wanting to catch a ball but the only time one came near us he wasn't paying attention. While we were there we met up with some of Brian's friends from work. Stephen played with their niece for most of the time we were there. He is quite the ladies man.


I had said I hoped to get a little reading done this weekend, and believe it or not I did. I finished the book Waiting for Morning by Karen Kingsbury. It was really a good story about a family touched by drunk driving. It follows the book of Lamentations. I also read some more in The Beck Diet Solution. The new tasks introduced were to always eat sitting down, to eat more slowly and mindfully, which makes perfect sense, and to find a diet coach.


I really tried to pay attention to what I was eating this weekend and take my time eating it. I had never realized how often I eat standing up. I can see where it will be helpful to pay attention to EVERY bite that goes into my mouth. As far a getting a diet coach, I already have several of those. Brian helps me to keep on track at home. At church, Tanya is always there following the same plan I am so that helps immensely. And at work there is Kathy. I guess she is my primary coach because we spend a lot of time discussing what she learns at meetings as well as sharing the ups and downs of our week. I know I would have never succeeded in keeping off the weight I have lost if it weren't for having a few people I felt accountable to.

Weight Loss Advantages

So I finally got to read day one of The Beck Diet Solution last night. The task was simply to make a list of the advantages of losing weight. This list is to be read at least twice a day to remind me of why I want to lose weight and maintain that loss. I am also supposed to read the list anytime I have a sabotaging thought about my weight loss. There was a long list of examples in the book but my list is rather short.

1. I want to be healthy.
2. I want to feel attractive.
3. I want my clothes to fit the way they should fit.
4. I want to be more fit - better able to do physical activities with the kids.
5. I want to have more confidence.
6. I want to be in control of what I eat, rather than having my cravings control me.
7. I just really want to be comfortable with my body and feel better about how I look.

So there you go - day one is done. I also went ahead with day two's task. It is to choose two diet plans. The first plan is the primary plan and the second is a backup plan just in case the first doesn't work out. That was an easy task. I know Weight Watchers Points works for me - obviously since I have been following it for four years. So that is my primary plan - just to be officially following the book my backup will be the Weight Watchers Core plan.

Weekend Plans

Tonight we are going to an Arkansas Traveler's baseball game. We got free tickets for everyone, so we are going with a bunch of people from work. It should be fun if we don't get rained on. Tomorrow I am going to a baby shower for my cousin's wife. Other than that I intend to spend the weekend relaxing - hopefully I will get a little reading done.

Jobs

I got a call earlier today from a friend who has had all she can take with her job. I could tell she had been crying. She asked that I pray for her, and also asked if I knew of any openings anywhere. I really feel bad for her because I know from experience that working in an environment where you aren't happy can make you miserable even when you aren't at work. It is hard to leave it at the office.

I have to say I am very blessed in my job. Not only do I like the work I am doing (most of the time), but I truly like the people I work with. I have said on many occasions that working in a good Christian workplace makes all the difference in the world. I have a boss that is truly interested in hearing what I have to say. I have co-workers whom I enjoy being around. Don't get me wrong, there are days that I would like to walk out of the office and never come back, but those days are few and far between (most of them during tax season).

I have had jobs where I was anything but happy. I absolutely hated every minute of my first real job. I was an admitting clerk in the emergency room. It was low paying, high stress, and I couldn't wait to leave everyday and I dreaded going back. After that I worked in customer service at a bank. I liked the work and the people, but the bank was bought up and I was "downsized".

The next three months were spent in misery at a job that was doomed before I ever started. I never really knew what my job was there. I was supposed to be an accounting clerk, but the person that preceded me in the job left before I started, and no one there knew how to train me. The company closed not long after I left.

I went from there to what was a wonderful job - for awhile. I was the office manager for a local company that was involved in mail order. After a couple of years there I realized I was nothing more than a babysitter. I had no real authority, and I could see that I never would. I couldn't make any decisions with out running them past the business manager and the plant manager (also the business owner). I ended up being miserable there, especially after Stephen was born. The hours during the holiday season were really long - I remember one 80 hour week. That was hard to deal with when I had a young son at home.

I decided after three years there that I couldn't handle it anymore and started searching for a new job. I looked for quite a while before sending my resume to a PO box for a job that I had no idea if I could even do. That is how I ended up here and I have been here ever since - six years this coming September.

On another note - I didn't do the first task in The Beck Diet Solution last night. I will try to get to it tonight though.

Worth a Read?

I started reading The Beck Diet Solution last night. I have really only read the introduction but it has some pretty common sense ideas in it so far. I will start tonight doing the daily tasks that are prescribed in the book. It has 6 weeks worth of tasks that are supposed to change the way you think about food and eating. Many of the tasks are things I already do such as tracking everything you eat. But there are also some new things for me that just might help in the area of maintaining my weight loss. I will report back on the various task and let you know how it is going.

Skylar has turned farmer. She spent Monday planting squash, corn, sunflowers and marigolds with my mom. I asked her if she was going to eat any of the veggies, and she quickly replied "No, they are just to look at." I bet we get her to try some before the summer is over. I just hope that her thumb is greener than mine or they won't even come up.

Weight Loss Challenge

It’s Tuesday, May 8th, and I’m kicking off my May Day Weight Loss Challenge hosted by Tales from the Scales (Finding that Skinny Girl One Pound at a Time). Here are the instructions from the site:
On Tuesday, May 8th, you post on your blog:

How much weight you want to lose: 11 lbs.

Your weight history: I have been overweight pretty much all of my life. At least all of it I can remember. After high school and marriage I got really big. Then after having Skylar, I learned to control my eating through weight watchers. I lost about 70 lbs in the months after she was born. I never did quite reach my goal (I would have liked to have lost another 15 pounds) and eventually gained about 10 pounds back over 3 years. In January of this year, I made up my mind to get back on track. Since then I have lost about 15 pounds and I still have 11 to go to reach my original goal.

What other goals you have for this challenge (creating activity, cutting out soda, etc.) and any weaknesses you have: While I have been exercising for the last year and a half, I would still like to be more active - I would like to do more outside activities. My weakness is overeating when a variety of food is put in front of me. Give me the proper portion and I have no problem stopping but put me at a buffet or potluck and I can't quit until I am overfull.


Report your loss/gain for that week on Tuesday.

I think I’d like to try this. How about you? It would give us a lot to share about, wouldn’t it? And we could encourage each other through the inevitable plateaus.

Up All Night...

Up all day - hey wait - that's not how Slaughter sings it. But so goes my life. Friday night was the Relay for Life and needless to say there wasn't much sleeping going on, but I did enjoy it anyway. The plan was for me and the kids to leave around nine and go home and get some sleep, then Brian would come home around two and I would go back. But by the time the luminary service and the fireworks were over (which the kids insisted on staying to see) it was nearly 11:30 before we got home and in bed. Then at 2:15 I was up again. Nobody could believe I actually came back. Trust me it was tempting to stay there in my nice warm, comfortable bed, but when I say I will do something, I try my best to do it. I went back and stayed until 6:45. I was back home by 7, and after walking almost 38,000 steps or 12.5 miles in 24 hours my body was weary. But I had a hard time sleeping. I napped until 9 am then I was up the rest of the day. I still haven't completely recovered, but I will survive.

I went to a family reunion Saturday. I wasn't really in the mood considering my lack of sleep, but I did enjoy getting to see some cousins that I haven't visited with in a while. It was also a boost to my ego because several people that had not seen me in several years had to ask who I was. They couldn't believe how much weight I had lost. That was definitely an nsv for me.

You Asked For It

Well the two of you who actually read this asked for it...so here it is. A recent picture of me. Special thanks to Melanie for snapping this with her phone. For some reason, I never seem to make it in front of my own camera.

It's a big change from the before picture. I don't know how long it will take me to get used to seeing myself as anything but fat. It has been almost 4 years since I started losing weight and I have been within 15 pounds of my goal for the better part of 3 years, but I still see myself as bigger than I am. It is wierd because I didn't see myself as big as as I was when I was fat - if that makes any sense at all.

On another note, tonight is the annual Relay for Life in Morrilton. I will spend most of the night at the football field raising money for the American Cancer Society. I am looking forward to spending time with some friends, and raising some money for a good cause.

I am Normal!!!

Never thought you would hear me say that did you? Well according to the CDC website my BMI or Body Mass Index falls into the normal catagory - probably for the first time since I was 4. While I am at the top of the normal range, I am not overweight. It is amazing to know that I have gone from being obese with a BMI of 35.4 right before I got pregnant with Skylar to being normal with a BMI of 24 now. And it is going to get better!!!!

What is even better is my 15 year class reunion is coming up in about a month. Many of these people haven't seen me since the last reunion which was about the time I hit my highest non pregnant weight. Here is a picture of me at that reunion.

Not pretty is it...I will post a recent picture soon...you won't even recognize me.

Busy Week

I can't believe it's been a week since I posted. I guess I have been busy. I took last Thursday and Friday off work, but it was no vacation. I spent all day Thursday cleaning house. I finally got around to some of those jobs that I just put off too long. I found the floor in both Skylar's and Stephen's rooms. I took advantage of not having them at home and got rid of some junk. It was a good decluttering. I need to do that more often.

Friday, Brian, Skylar and I went on a field trip to the Little Rock Zoo with Stephen's school. It was a wild day. There were probably 20-30 other schools there visiting that day, so needless to say it was a bit crowded. And after what seems like years of construction and renovations on that zoo, there are still many exhibits that either aren't open or are empty. The kids all seemed to enjoy it though.

The rest of the weekend was spent generally goofing off. It was nice. Too bad we can't do that every weekend. This weekend we will be participating in Relay for Life - the big fundraiser for the American Cancer Society. We will spend most of the night Friday walking the track at the high school. Needless to say Saturday will be spent resting.